One of the most common types of fantasy is the old classic of having sexual intercourse in public. The idea of being caught and even getting a little jail time can get the juices flowing. But there is more to undressing or engaging in sexual activities while in public. As Sari Cooper, a New York-based sex therapist, has said, it brings out the performer in us when we perform a sex act, even a non-sex act like kissing, in public. Plus, it can also bring you and your lover closer.
Living That YOLO Lifestyle
Nowadays, a lot of people, especially women, are living or want to live that YOLO (you only live once) lifestyle. The idea is to live in the moment and do all that you desire. For a lot of people, that can include having sex in public. Be it in a public bathroom where people can hear your moans or having hot car sex in a car park.
People often want to throw caution away and feel the thrill of doing something new. The excitement is what gets you going regardless of the sex position. Go for it and have a consensual quickie in the passenger seat of a car or try doggy style in the bathroom. The challenge makes it more rewarding.
However, there is a downside to being spontaneous, and that is safety. While it would be great to seize the moment, you have to remember that unwanted pregnancies and STDs can happen.
The Anonymity Is Exciting
The draw of indecent exposure is not only in the thrill and the YOLOness, but it is also in the anonymity. People can walk past you doing the deed at any moment. However, they have no clue who you are, and this adds to the excitement. It goes backs to the performer aspect in us.
An actor gets a thrill playing to the audience, but many of them do not know the actor’s first name. Plus, the actor does not know who many of the audience members are.
Plus, you may not know the person with whom you are engaging in sexual intercourse well or at all. You could know their name, but that’s about it. It can add to the exhilaration.
Putting on a Show Is Arousing
Keeping to the themes of voyeurism and bringing out the performer in all of us — public sex is much like putting on a show. It can make it more arousing. Now, we are not saying that you go out of your way to entertain the random, nameless passersby that may come around. That is not what we are getting at.
What we are saying is that when you are in public, people can see you. When you are doing the deed that should be behind closed doors, this adds to the excitement of it. Public sex is taboo, and that makes it, well, sexy in a way. The idea of having sex in public is not for people to watch. Instead, it is for you and your lover to be in the moment and lose control. The audience is a bonus.
You Aren’t in Control
Public sex is unplanned; that is why you should make sure you have protection at all times. The unplanned aspect of it can make you feel as if you are not in control but in a liberating way. You give in to your emotions and just go for it. It is like a show but an unplanned, emotional show. You would do the deed regardless of the space or the people that may see you. The desire takes over or is too strong to fight. Why else would so many people have sex in a public bathroom that is often dirty? Or a car that is too small, and you have to deal with the seat belts?
It’s Liberating to Break the Rules
As mentioned, public sex is taboo. The idea that you would bring something private to public space is breaking an unwritten rule. This adds to the freedom of the act. It’s like you are doing something that you know is not allowed. The rebel inside you jumps out, followed closely by the performer. Rebels break the rules, and we all have a little one inside us waiting to blow.
Plus, it is liberating to act out your rebellious side once in a while. There are a lot of worse things that a rebel can do besides having consensual sex in public, so this may be the best way to let the rebel loose.
It Makes Same-Old Sex Feel Fresh and New
In marriages or long-term relationships, sex can get repetitive. This may take the spark out of the sexual acts. But instead of trying a new position, why not try a new location? Public sex is a way to make the old and familiar look and feel new and different.
You can do your go-to position but in a new area, and this will make it feel like you are doing it for the first time. It may be the kick that your sexual relationship needs to keep it exciting. Spicing up a relationship is not a bad thing. There is nothing as spicy as doing the deed in public.
It can also give you better orgasms and help you feel a deeper emotional connection with your lover. It makes for a dirty little secret that you cannot share. You feel like accomplices in a harmless crime.
Public sex is about excitement, living in the moment, and having a deeper connection. It is risky, but that is the thrill of it. Let yourself go and be in the sexy moment where others might see you. You’re guaranteed to have an amazing time and a memory you’ll cherish for a long time.